Differences between mother parenting styles and how they influence the children

The influence of different parenting styles of mothers on the development of a child.

Mothers: the wonderful, one-of-a-kind, essential part of a child’s life. These wonderful human beings are diverse, each embodying a unique parenting approach that shapes their child’s life, social skills and self-esteem. In this blog, we explore four archetypal types of parenting styles, focusing on mothers: The Authoritarian, The Ambitious, The Empathetic, and The Permissive. Understanding your mothering style allows for conscious parenting choices, fostering a strong and healthy mother and child relationship from the early childhood. It’s completely normal not to fit into a single ‘mother box,’ and many mothers find themselves embodying a mix of these types.

The Authoritarian Mother

Authoritarian parents tend to uphold strict rules with no room for discussion. Authoritative parenting behaviors set clear expectations while disobedience causes punishment. However, when children of authoritative parents have to stay within a framework that allows no explanation, this may lead to them wanting to break the rules and ultimately losing respect. Mutual respect is crucial, and dictating rules without dialogue shows lack of respect towards what your child needs.

Break out of your role:

Provide explanations for specific requests, and then show your understanding. For instance, ‘I understand that you don’t want to turn off the TV, but we have to go now. You can watch TV when we get back home.’ This approach maintains discipline while showing respect during different situations.

The Ambitious Mother

You have already signed your little star in numerous activities, such as piano and singing lessons, convinced of their extraordinary talents. While encouragement is positive, children who grow with excessive demands and expectations over them have higher levels of stress, while they can foster feelings of inadequacy if they can’t meet your ambitions. Every mother believes that their child is perfect; But what if the rest of the world does not agree? This might be an unpleasant shock to your child and cause low self-esteem, if they’ve always been told they are the best. 

Break out of your role:

Shift focus from what you think your child should excel in to what they genuinely enjoy. Understand their preferences, whether it’s singing, soccer, or something else, and avoid projecting your perfectionist ideals. This understanding will enhance children’s self-esteem and improve child satisfaction and performance. 

The Empathetic Mother

You excel at helping your child empathize with others and understand their emotions. Your ability to empathize fosters an understanding and resilient relationship where no grudges are held and forgiveness is spread. The warmth of expressions assist your child in putting their feelings into words and understanding the reasoning behind their feelings and reactions.

Break out of your role:

While empathy is vital, balance it with clear boundaries. Draw inspiration from the Authoritarian Mother to set explicit limits, ensuring a well-rounded approach to parenting. Affection combined with some limits cares for a healthy bond between a mother and her child. 

The Permissive Mother

Loving and attentive, permissive parents find it challenging to set boundaries or let children face the consequences when inobedient. Saying ‘no’ might quickly turn to ‘yes’ when faced with your child’s tears. While aiming to be your child’s friend and constantly please them, the lack of defined limits can lead to confusion. Children of permissive parents might find it difficult to understand the roles and expectations set on them, forcing troublemaking behaviours. 

Break out of your role:

Try reflecting on why setting boundaries is challenging, as it is often tied to personal struggles. Understanding your boundaries enables you to convey clear expectations to your child and makes a significant difference in avoiding confusion and insubordination.